Failed or Just Adjusted?

Sundays are my favorite run day, it is the only day of the week that I get to run outside when the sun is shining. During the week I run before my kids are up or any obligations get in my way, which means I am out and running well before the sun is shining. If my early morning run doesn't happen and the sun is shining than I am on the treadmill. Sundays are different. Sundays I love to be on the trail just as the sun is coming up. Thankfully my husband is usually willing to help make that work, although sometimes I have to give in and let him have first run of the day.

After three kids with the flu this week, my middle one starting kindergarten, the craziness of my two year old, and all of the other normal craziness that fills our lives I was looking forward to my trail time. But as I started driving up the hill towards the trail I felt my legs get heavier and heavier (I haven't even gotten out of the car yet!) and my whole body start to feel like it would rather be driving towards a comfortable bed and a nice long nap.

I got out of my car telling myself that I will feel better once I get going and off I went. I pushed and struggled for 20 minutes muttering a multitude of words I cannot repeat with my children around when I pulled up to a stop and looked around. I was miserable and just wanting to be done. With that thought in mind I decided I was done. I slowly walked back to the car and headed home.

I came home feeling like a failure, but the reality is that I wasn't a failure. I know my body. I have learned to listen to it and do what it needs. This wasn't a lazy day, this was a day where my body was begging me for rest. It needed an easy day to recover from the week. Sure, I could have pushed through and completed a miserable run. I wouldn't have come home any happier, I would have come home miserable and questioning if I should have really gone through it all.

Now I am home and back in the chaos. Perfectly content even though both bathrooms upstairs need to be mopped up after having two kids take a bath, the pile of pillows at the bottom of the stairs (also known as a soft landing spot for kids launching themselves off of the landing), and the noise is reverberating throughout the house.